Therapy With Maple Grove
At Maple Grove Counselling, I provide psychotherapy for adults dealing with anxiety, trauma, stress, depression, and relationship challenges. I offer EMDR therapy, individual therapy, and couples counselling both online across Ontario and in-person for clients seeking practical, compassionate support. Based out of Kitchener in the Belmont village, serving KW, Cambridge, and more broadly serving Ontario through virtual therapy. I am here to help you.
Services
Anxiety
Anxiety is so exhausting. We may learn to deal with it at best but it is like trying to carry 80 things without a bag to put them in, our mind divided on all these things to worry about and no way to adequately address the problem at hand. Your mind never shuts off, overthinking, catstrophizing, worrying about messing up that presentation at work, or that social interaction the other day. It is so draining mentally and emotionally, and sometimes physically always being so "on."
There are lots of presentations of anxiety. Anything from panic, to social anxiety, overthinking, burnout, chronic stress, one could even argue perfectionism and all of the strain and inner conflict that can cause. All of it can be treated with slightly different applications of the same strategies and skills. So do not worry, we can get you where you want to go.
I first started therapy as a student treating anxiety as my main focus, I am proficient and confident in my ability to help with this. Together we can work toward a greater feeling of mental peace and clarity. Help make space for our emotions so they don't get in our way, and train the mind to challenge our thinking. We'll go over practical tools that work for you and practice them until they become quite natural, wherein you will find much more calm in daily life.
Trauma
Not all wounds are visible, but they can still change everything. Trauma- it goes without saying- is something nobody should have to go through. And if you are reading this, I assume you have been through something like that, and I am sorry. Traumatic experience scars us, wounds us, leaves us feeling ruined and like we don't know who we are or if we even are. As adults it can feel like we're a statue that got broken or shattered, as a kid it is like the concrete is still being poured and someone tampered with the mixture. It really shakes us up, be it clinical PTSD or subclinical trauma, it is a lot to deal with. It is not fair, and thus it is not worth trying to handle alone. I am here to help. I want to help, and it has never failed to warm my heart seeing my clients recover from traumatic past experiences. Getting trained in EMDR it was described to me as transitioning from "reliving to remembering" and that has stuck with me. The past ought live in the past so the present can be the present. And we can make that happen for you.
My approach is really predominantly EMDR, there are other approaches we can discuss but I find EMDR to really be a powerhouse in this area and quite effective comparatively. Also with a slightly broader use case, and one that really targets the emotional wounds most efficiently. Trauma work is where I have poured most of my focus in my career and is another area I would say I am very comfortable and confident. All of these areas are, but this I would say sits atop the pile as trauma informed care is what I have centered my practice around.
Relationships
Relationships are a beautiful thing when they work. I bet your relationship used to feel easier. They teach us things we couldn't necessarily learn otherwise. I love relationships and I love, love. Not surprising for a therapist, especially a couples therapist. Many things can disrupt a relationship though. And couple's therapy is largely skill building. How do we communicate properly so that we both feel heard? How do I make it easy for my partner to help me? How do I help calm myself and "self-soothe" when things get heated so we can get back to a productive conversation? How do we reconnect when it feels like we have drifted and don't share many meaningful moments anymore? And so on. All things we can help with.
Another problem area for many couples in couples therapy unsurprisingly is infidelity. Cheating is a common rupture in relationships. It breaks trust, and thus we need to rebuild it. This is hard and a long road of recovery but one that, if you want it, is worth it, and is very possible with some work and some openness.
I apply Gottman Couple's Therapy developed my John and Julie Gottman of the Gottman institute. A monolith of research into relationships. It will walk us through seven core areas of relationships, one of which is communication and conflict management. We will assess weak points and begin skill building. Anyone can learn these things, anyone can have a really wonderful relationship, and that is what we will do.
Depression
Depression is heavy, it is like walking around with an 80lbs weight strapped to our chest. And it can compound so quickly, "why is this so hard for me" "I'm so lazy I just don't want to get out of bed" "so lazy and worthless, everyone else is so much more productive and capable than me." And so on and so on. It hurts, and our mind will wail on us making us feel even worse. It is not easy and I want to lend a compassionate ear to what you are going through. When and how this started, how you are feeling. And to remind you that it is okay. We can get you where you want to go. And I know it is defeating and painful and frustrating to think of how hard things feel, and how we wish it was different. We will get there.
Depression is an area that benefits often from cognitive/behavioural approaches like CBT and ACT. EMDR is often quite helpful as well depending on the source from which the Depression arises as trauma and painful past experience is also a common culprit. We will figure it out together and get you where you want to be. There will be a lot of practice of compassion along the way, and things will get better.
My Approach
EMDR
Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing (EMDR) Therapy is really effective for undoing and unlearning painful ways we may see ourselves, and taking the impact out of painful experiences we had to endure. This can look like a lot of different things, from intense trauma to unstable environments that may not be healthy for us. An example of this often is self-worth, maybe I know that I have worth but still feel worthless, or just don't feel like I'm "enough" but believe in my rational mind I am (or should be).
EMDR is great for getting right into the emotional part of the brain and doing some deeper unlearning of these emotional narratives we have of ourselves ("I'm not enough," "I'm a loser," "I'm not someone people like to be around"). By targeting these beliefs themselves as well as the past experiences that built them in the first place, we can get to a really transformative place. It is not easy to confront our demons, our pasts, but that is why I'm here, to help, lend a hand, so you aren't doing it alone.
In my work I have taken a special focus on a trauma informed approach, and of all the trauma/PTSD treatments I have learned, this one is my favourite for a number of reasons. I will not bore you with the details, but it is effective and I have seen it work in a large number of cases.
ACT
I am a big fan of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). It is based off of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) which I also practice, but I find ACT has a more flexible application, less demanding practice/homework, and a broader use-case. ACT grounds itself in the very realistic philosophy that life is hard, and a certain amount of suffering is without a doubt, part of the equation. It is inescapable. But we can still live really rich and amazing lives despite that.
With ACT we seek to clarify what is important and meaningful to us, this compass helps to inspire us, keep us motivated, and guide us, it really enriches our lives. We also try to learn "mindfulness" skills. Tools that help us to make space and not just tolerate but live peacefully or even appreciate the full range of "good" to "bad" emotions we will naturally feel, and still engage fully in what we are doing (which is hopefully something meaningful, aligned with our compass). We accept and open ourselves up to the present, avoiding denial of it, attune to our values, take the sting out of any painful distracting thinking which helps us to commit to actions guided by our values/compass.
The beauty is that it works well when our mind is playing tricks on us, pain that feels and perhaps is irrational. But it also works wonderfully in situations where that pain is very real and very warranted, we can still stay the course and carry ourselves well, and ACT helps do that. And that is a good way to compound into a really wonderful life over time.
Gottman Couple's Therapy
Gottman couple's therapy is a lot of skill building. In my ideal world a lot of this is taught to kids. Because the thing is that a lot of relationship difficulties come down to people not being taught the relevant skills. That is why it works, because we can learn to get better at relationships. I take an approach of trying to teach my couple's to fish rather than catching fish for them. I want you to need me as little as possible, so we learn the communication skills, and practice them on whatever problems you two are going through.
In Gottman therapy there are 7 empirically validated significant components of a relationship. Love Maps, Shared Fondness and Admiration, Turning Toward Instead of Away, Positive Perspective, Conflict Mangement, Supporting Life Dreams, and Creating Shared Meaning. Its a lot of jargon but the names are self explanatoy to an extent. I go over it in session one.
Basically, we work to get you two communicating in a way that facilitates understanding and being understood, and in ways that keep defenses down. We work on getting you two to really know each other again, ways to help you two really want the relationship, find rituals of connection, the little things every day that are really meaningful, and so on.
Meet Ben
I started dedicating myself to psychology and therapy after realizing that I wasn't built to be a software developer. I'm thrilled that now to get to hear the stories of so many amazing people, and help get you where you want to go as a person.
I was born and raised in Kitchener. I am now serving the public as a therapist near downtown Kitchener, in Belmont Village! Book in with me and grab a pastry across the street.
As a Registered Psychotherapist I am in good standing with the College of Registered Psychotherapists (CRPO).
License #: 12581
Contact
678 Belmont Ave W, Unit 304
Kitchener, ON N2M 1N6, Canada
Feel free to reach out with any questions or to book as well!